touch wood....

hhuuuhh!!!semister end! exams round the corner! race for summer internships!!but why am i not taxed by the above factors??scary huh! nah!maybe its contentment. For the first time in life....i dont feel like holding back,i dont wanna think,i so want to escape the clutter of my mind and the brightest of all...i m sort of convincd to broaden!its not that all sombre factors of my life have finished!everything is so damn same,yet the 'gypsy me' is unleashed!this is perhaps of of the lightest patches of life! sometimes i wonder that has god really started to think about me,but on other occassions i think that whatever it might be.....its BEAUTIFUL!this phase would be the unforgetable time of life! a time that would never give my regrets in life! when i'll be amidst pain...perchance both emotional and physical, i'll recollect honey memories of this phase and combat pain!yaaay !! i am just so happy.....

just another blog

Almost at the end of this year!
With a true belief that 2010 would be positive, promising, and of course a better world altogether!
This year has been both testing and taxing! Right now after reading “eleven minutes” and embarking on “Brida” I feel some kind of a feeling that puts me away from the regular norms of the society but then still I am raged ! There’s a lot that contribute to this frustration!
I have taken up fagging, the finances of my family are diminishing….and the moolah factor has a worse than adverse affect on me!
I cant buy clothes, cant go out to have fun…every other thought in my minds has a calculator attached.. the irony is that I still am not improving on my calculations. Market research calculations freak me out every time! Jeez I am so ducked!
“there’s a prostitute as well as a house wife in every woman” .this is a very intense and a true line quoted by Mr. Paulo Coelho. There is a “skin hunter” as well as a home spun female in a woman who looks out for adulation and security. Both these sides should meet in a very careful and a correct manner else the results could be devastating.
Never knew that I would be a loner in this world full of people….sounds dramatic but its hell true!
My friends are busy managing their love and life! I was never that close to my family! Don’t really wanna date ! am just stuck!
Eagerly waiting for this year to end….
I know there would no miracle at in the new year, but at least that would brake a severe monotony.
I have a numerous questions in my mind! The answers to them are impossible to get! nothing is easy bloody everything has an expensive tag!
I am filled with negativity!! Bad! I know! But every time I try to kick-start with a new vibe, something pulls me down! When would this end?? When?
I am NOT SCARED of being tried ……. But I am a bit exhausted repeating the same trial drill every time!

Phoenix

What am I running away from? Exactly what?
The miseries of my life ,family,…or myself!
Each day I wake up to the idleness of life. I have no p.o.a! No place to go! no goal to achieve! No dream to tame!....where on earth is that spark lost?
Why did it all have to end?------this poignant question has absolutely no answer!
But weirder is the fact that I know I am not reaching anywhere! yet walking>>>
Why am I doing this? Am I just adding more to the things that have already gone wrong with me?
Have I really crossed that line that lies between love and hate…or am I still lingering on the periphery of it???
Am I living unnoticed? or in someone else’s shell…..
I don’t know what it is? But one thing that my inner self wants my skin to know is that what lies beneath is the embryo of renaissance! An egg that gets not the cosy but the blistering warmth to hatch into someone who’s rock –solid and refuses to give up.

An Achillies ’s incarnation who’s born without the fatal heel.

a crave that never dies......

i am so damn bewildered about the viscious desires and expectations i have form myself ....... i want to be everything possible in llife....maybe coz i am just too excited for things, big or small, that happen to me...be it colg, love and perhaps his kin,the unsatiated desire to unravel the new me, a new 'top' on sale,my new pink ballerinas,the brownn clip that i bought ,my swift exhausting pocket money,my cherry flavoured lip balm....jeez...everything
everything seem b'ful and ambitious....bt on a closer view ,i have convieniently messed up everywhere....i am living a hasty life...just going with its flow....things happen to me...then they stop happening to me...again they strat happening to me.....i feel like a glutton who has to gulp every bite!....
i am sprinting in a stranded plush green land......sunny day,birds chirping, the plot is perfect.....bt then there is a profusely sweating me with a heart rate uncountable! i sit on a bench and then retire to to think i might have evrything but own nothing

i am my own piece of art..my own creation

hey fellers !!!
well.... to describe the woman i am is a tad difficult as many a times i too find it difficult to decipher what i am....the song "new soul"by yael naim describes me best at this point of time!
i am precisely on the periphery of realising my dreams and aspirations and at the same time learn a lot of things!
i look forward to gain success (by this i mean to earn name labels and of course love...i dont really understand what love is bt its absense is immensely felt).
in accordance to the song i mentioned , i make every possible mistake!!!this is how experiment with myself....
clumsy at times,goofing up every now and then ...i somehow am able to sail..bt nt smoothly sail..lol.. ppl say its fun goofing up and learning...bt perhaps this needs a deeper comprehension..which i'll only be able to do once i am done with my sailing and actually get a chance to look back on things i have done!!!
i am fun-loving and chirpy!!! doesnt mean that i am neveer serious ...i am...but i gradually triumph on my woes....
i am true feminist and absolutely condem the idea of comparing both sexes .... i guess both complete and compliment each other....
jeez i hv no clue as to what i am writing ....this place will gradually get updated ...... ;) so keep reading!!!!!